Good Enough. Never be defined by your past.

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TRY TO BE GOOD ENOUGH

During a recent interview at London Real, the author and philosopher Alain De Botton shared a few thoughts about being “good enough” and stop grumping about any upbringing challenge.

For Alain, we as adults sit on an emotional base formed in childhood. Many behaviours we manifest as adults can be traced back to things that happened to us as a child.

He acknowledges that this could sound very boring! C’mon. We are adults. We are the captains of our souls; should we think that part of what we are doing now dates back to something related to our parents? 

Yes, and the best thing we can do is open up to and recognize it. We are all products of our childhood.

However, Alain also states that, past our early 40s,

we need to stop grumping about our parents and realize they did what they could, considering who they were and where they were coming from.

We must realize that we all, as parents, children and individuals alike, “don’t need to be perfect: we only need to be good enough”. Alan thinks this sentence could sound either obvious or miraculous depending on who we are: for many, this approach can open a new personal development journey of self-acceptance.

Do you resonate with Alain’s comments? Identifying a “good enough” identity and good enough goals is a lifelong exercise and part of an intentional living lifestyle. Alain also makes me think about how important it is to learn to write off losses: let go of any resentment and burden linked to our childhood, upbringing or past events.

His thoughts remind me of these two quotes:

“There is an expiry date on blaming your parents for steering you in the wrong direction; the moment you are old enough to take the wheel, responsibility lies with you.” (J.K. Rowling).

“Never be defined by your past: it was just a lesson, not a life sentence”. (Anonym)

Keep it real. Never be defined by your past. Enjoy your journey for your good enough sweet spot.

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